In my book, The Way of Being Lost, I wrote a chapter called Removing the Asterisk.
I found myself thinking about it yesterday. How through deep excavation I got to the root of the core beliefs that had evolved into deep and seemingly lasting self-loathing. Yesterday I realized with great joy that that self-loathing truly is gone! Because gone that subtle nefarious asterisk I carried around for so long:
God loves everyone in the whole wide world.
No exceptions.*
* Except for Mary Victoria Price.
However, the reason I was thinking about that asterisk is because I realized that there are other asterisks that need removing. More alarming, I had never really noticed them before. They are apparently even more subtle and nefarious. This is how those asterisks play themselves out:
I am perfect whole and complete.
*Except for these beliefs around . . .
The gift of this work of wholeness is that it allows us to recognize where our thoughts are not holistic. Where we are not seeing ourselves or others or our actions or our world as whole. And then through this heart-centered process, beginning to remember that Wholeness is A Fact. It is not something we achieve. It is something we already are. . .we just have to be willing to clean our window, lift up some old rugs, go into the cobwebby corners. AND we need to take a look at where we have allowed any asterisks (any supposed exceptions to the rule of Wholeness) to attach themselves. And by attach themselves, I mean in thought — not in reality.
None of us can be anything less than whole. But we do need to look at where we may have unconsciously accepted a less than holistic idea and let itself become an allowed exception to the Rule of Wholeness.
For example, are there certain habits or health conditions or ways of being that you have come to think are “just the way things are”? You might say: I am depressed, bad with money, a late-night eater, a poor sleeper. The list could go on and on.
And on most days, you can live with that. After all it’s just the way you are.
Are you? Are you really? Or at some point did you let that asterisk attach itself so thoroughly to you that you have come to think of it as you.
And when that day comes where that little asterisk threatens to take you down, is it finally time then to claim your wholeness? Or is doing that something that should be a daily and deliberate, conscious and committed heart-centered practice every single day?
I believe that, if you really think about it, you’ll choose the latter.
To remove these asterisks, we have to do what I did in The Way of Being Lost, dig deep. Past the unconscious belief that we may be holding that this is just “who we are”. But we can’t really dig deep unless we start with the firm and unshakeable understanding that We Are Whole.
So first things first: Try to find the root of whatever asterisk you’re looking at. Then rewind the tape to before that moment. To before the first time you thought of yourself as overweight or bad with money or addicted to something or subject to a debilitating condition — and see yourself before that moment. See yourself then through the eyes of Love. Which is how Love still sees you. And hold that you in your heart as you work through this heart-centered practice.
(And just to bring in yesterday’s perspective: This is not selfish work. This is not me first work. We are hearing that we are in a Civil War. More like a Civility War. We have lost our sense of being a Whole. We have lost our understanding that each of us is related to all of us — and that all of our choices affect one another. So doing this work so that we can each see ourselves as whole will have a profound effect on our world.)
So here goes today’s heart-centered practice of removing the asterisk as I am working through it::
WHAT HAPPENS: I find myself looping through the same cycle of thoughts, actions, physical sensations, beliefs over and over again. Every single day.
WHAT I FEEL: That they are me and that they are not me.
WHAT I TELL MYSELF: I am not this same cycle of thoughts, actions, sensations, beliefs. That the me that is observing all this knows this. That me is the real me, the true me, the whole me.
WHAT I WANT: To break the habit of thinking that I am this or that or the other kind of person. To see myself as whole in Love.
WHAT TO DO NEXT: Begin rightly. Begin in Love.
AND AFTER THAT: Check in. Did this come from Love? If not, do not consent.
WHAT I DON’T ALWAYS DO: Recognize that some old habits of thought slip by unnoticed because they seem so much like “me”.
WHAT I WOULD LIKE TO DO INSTEAD: Learn to make my basis the Whole Me, not this accumulated compendium of experiences and beliefs me covered in asterisks.
THE FEAR FACTOR: Who will I be without these asterisks? AND/OR If you don’t get rid of these asterisks they could take you down.
WHAT LOVE IS ALWAYS SAYING: You are Whole. I see you as you are. See yourself and everyone else through my eyes. Through the Eyes of Love.
WHY THIS MATTERS: If I can’t see myself as whole, how can I see anyone else as whole? If I accept that I am covered in asterisks then I am going to accept that about everyone else? And then it’s a Whole covered in a lot of asterisks. Oh wait: Isn’t that just what the coronavirus looks like?
HOW I WILL PRACTICE WHOLENESS:
I will begin rightly.
I will see myself and others as Whole
I will remember that asterisks are not the truth of me.
I will go back to when those asterisks attached and remember before them.
I will affirm that they weren’t “me” then so they can’t be “me” now. And they won’t be “me” in the future or forever.
I will not consent to being covered with asterisks.
I will affirm that wholeness in Love is the only reality.
I will be grateful for every asterisk I see, so that it can be removed.
I will know that nothing and no one can be less than whole..
I will stand in Love’s presence unafraid. Always.
I will know that we are all the loved of Love. No exceptions.
And I will trust that this heart-centered practice of wholeness is available to us all. No exceptions, no asterisks.
I am. We are. All. Perfect. Whole. Complete. No asterisks. Right. Now.
Today’s video is called The Parable of the Stranger, and it’s about how we unconsciously let certain thoughts take up residence in our lives. The tool that allows me to embed the video in this blog is broken today. . . But this is a really cool teaching, so check it out by clicking the button below!