A few weeks ago, I wrote that we were in the middle of the marathon. By all reckoning then, we should be nearing the end. . .Except that we’re not.
I got the metaphor wrong. Not only that, there really is no metaphor for what we’re all experiencing. Because there’s never been a global event like this. And that’s kind of the whole point.
Extraordinary times not only call for extraordinary measures. They call for an extra-ordinary reckoning by us all every single day.
So, any attempt to put this experience into a box is precisely that. An attempt to put the entire world and all our experiences into a box. It’s impossible.
Yesterday I realized that even my own perspective on my own experience was flawed. I was thinking that this had stopped me from being the nomad I’ve been for the past four years. When in fact, even before I became intentionally home-free, I was living on the road 200-250 nights a year for another half decade before that.
So I am stopped in one place with no plans to move for quite a while for the first time in almost a decade. Not only that, I am stopped with no place to go except for walks. Not only that, the world is in utter flux and intense transformation all around me, in a way that is showing us every human flaw.
I’d been looking at this from my little angle, and even that was skewed.
What is the metaphor for that?
For years I’ve said that when water breaks through a dam in a particular place, it’s not because the water beat harder on that one place. The water pounds on the concrete equally. It breaks through where the dam is the weakest. I guess what we’re seeing is that almost our whole global dam is very weak. And so, as the water is pouring over everything, we are recognizing that not only may we not be able to build a new dam, but that damming might not have been such a great idea in the first place.
That’s why this heart-centered practice of wholeness seems to important to me right now. I believe that the only way things are going to change is for each of us to show up and willingly transform our own lives — by asking ourselves where our lives are not whole.
What do I mean by this? I mean the areas where we have not lived in integrity and honesty as it relates to the whole picture. One clue can be found in the word “too”.
As we look at our lives, are there places where something feels too? If so, that’s someplace we should look first. . .
Too busy, too heavy, too lonely, too angry, too hungry, too tired, too full, too empty, too big, too small.
We have been trained to see these things as individual issues. Perhaps even individual flaws. But what I think we’re all beginning to see is that if our lives are out of whack, pretty soon the whole planet gets out of whack.
I often fly small planes. You know, the ones that feel no bigger than a paper towel tube. Well, on those planes, everything has to be right or everything can go wrong. You can’t have too many people in one section of the plane, the amount of luggage has to be correct, the fuel has to be measured out perfectly. One thing is off, and it has to be fixed or you can’t take off. There’s more margin for error on the big planes. But on those little ones, the details matter.
Well, we’ve all been trying to fly around with way too much out of whack — and now our whole planet, our whole population is out of whack. We’ve been basing our sense of safety and security on systems that are operating completely out of alignment and then are shocked that those systems can no longer make us feel safe. Suddenly we’re wondering if we should ever have been flying this way in the first place.
How’s that for some more attempts at metaphors?
These are big questions. We’re all trying to understand what’s happening any way we can. But these questions, this issues, these times can seem so big that they sometimes scare us. And that’s when we turn on the TV and hope that things will go back to the normal we see on the screen.
They can’t.
We’re way past that point in the race.
Here’s the bottom line:
Unless each of us find a way to live more holistically, none of us will.
Every single choice each of us makes has a larger consequence.
Period. The end.
That’s why every single day this month (and the next month and the next), I am going to keep honing this process of checking in on anything that happened that didn’t feel whole, healthy, holistic, holy. And then work through this process so I can see what is real and heart-centered, what is fake and old and fear-based, and keep trying to make more holistic choices.
I’ve been at this for ten days, and already I can feel its positive effect. I am starting to ask myself if the choices I am making are whole before I make them. . .and that’s some kind of progress.
Please join me. . .please join me in creating your own heart-centered practice of wholeness.
Here’s yesterday’s process:
WHAT HAPPENED: I had to choose whether to buy something that was a moderately bigger ticket item. I haven’t been spending money on anything unnecessary right now. And I couldn’t figure out whether this was necessary or unnecessary.
WHAT I INITIALLY FELT: Like avoiding the whole thing.
WHAT I INITIALLY ASKED MYSELF: Do you really need this? And if you do, is it worth the money it costs? Do you even have the money?
WHAT I INITIALLY WANTED: An easy button.
WHAT I DID: I weighed through the pros and cons. I recognized that I have been thinking about this for two months from a place of need not frivolous desire.
WHAT I WOULD HAVE LIKED TO HAVE DONE: Have a fairy godmother, a genie with a lamp, or a massive bank account. (In other words, live in LaLa Land — because avoidance is one of my clear-cut signs of something being less than whole.)
WHAT I DID INSTEAD: I thought it all through and made a very conscious decision.
WHAT FEAR SAID: You’ve been pretty good these past few months. Cautious and thoughtful. . .but now it’s all going down the drain. Watch out. You’re not good at this. And it’s a slippery slope!
WHAT LOVE SAID: Lean on me. Listen to me. Trust me. That’s all.
WHAT FELT UNTRUE AND/OR OLD: Worry about money.
WHAT FELT TRUE AND NEEDS ATTENTION: The imperative need to continue to turn every decision — including all financial ones — over to Love not fear.
WHY THIS MATTERS: This is an area of my life that has been out of whack for as long as I can remember. To shift from fear-based fractured financial worry to holistic heart-centered Supply is perhaps the most essential expression of holistic living I can demonstrate right now.
WHAT IS NOT WHOLE: Any kind of thinking or decision making that is not rooted and grounded beginning, middle and end in Love.
HOW I WILL PRACTICE WHOLENESS:
I will go back to my childhood prayer each morning and with each decision:
Love: What shall we do today? Tell us, and we will obey.
I will obey Love by listening only for Love’s answers.
I will ask myself what is driving this purchase? And whether the cost of that purchase feels commensurate with what I believe I need and can actually afford.
I will be willing to say no, to hear no, not to act.
When I do say yes, I will trust that the yes is led by Love and so will be supplied.
I will ask Love to keep helping me let go of my old stories and old habits of human will.
I will remember that Love’s presence eradicates the lie of fear.
I will rejoice in every opportunity to see and heal what is not whole.
I will follow Love all the rugged way.
Here’s the link to today’s heart-centered video: