I love words. . . so when a word comes to me I often look up its origin.
This morning what came to me were two words that seem related — and are. But have a very different manifestation. The words are compulsory and compulsive.
Both come from the same medieval Latin word: compulsivus, from compuls- ‘driven, forced’, from the verb compellere
This showed me that there are other words that have come from this such as compel, compelling. And of course there is compulsion.
What the difference between all of these words? Well, let’s take a look.
compulsory means required by rule or law or obligation
compulsive resulting from, relating to, acting on an irresistible urge, especially one that is against one's conscious wishes.
a compulsion is similar to the above but is also the action or state of forcing or being forced to do something; constraint.
to compel is to force or drive or use pressure
compelling is evoking interest, attention, or admiration in a powerfully irresistible way — and therefore not usually able to be refuse
So most of these words imply something forced from the outside perhaps resulting in behavior that may harm us or others and that we may regret. And then compelling turns that on its ear — and what is irresistible is not necessarily bad, and most probably beautiful or fascinating and powerful.
Why am I thinking about all this? Because yesterday I didn’t take a walk.
I can’t remember the last time I didn’t take a walk. I LOVE to walk, and my walks are my purest joy each day. But yesterday I decided not to walk — and that allowed me to take a good long hard look at all those words. . .and a lot of other things.
This all came up by looking not only at my own behavior but at the behavior of many of my clients and some of my friends. Those of us who have found our way through this time by working working working. By being driven.
Are we compulsive? Or is the work we are doing compelling?
Am I a compulsive walker? Or do I find walks utterly compelling?
What I came to realize is that the difference between all those words is the same difference I keep saying drives each of us and our world: Are our choices fear-based or heart-centered in Love?
So with today’s heart-centered process of wholeness, I am not going to look at one specific event. Rather I am going to look at the unconsciousness I have around doing in general.
Why am I doing this? Because I believe that each and every single one of us is being called to unpack habits and see whether they are fear-based or heart-centered. Because how we move through this world is reflected in the world. And we need to show up in Love in order to transform and heal our world together!
So here goes. . .a slight variation on the process:
WHAT USUALLY HAPPENS: I feel shot from a cannon to do something such as write this blog, go for a walk, come up with and follow through on a creative idea.
WHAT I INITIALLY FEEL: Excitement. Hope. Relief at having something exciting to do. Loved and loving.
WHAT I INITIALLY TELL MYSELF: This is a heart-centered practice. I am living Love.
WHAT I INITIALLY WANT: To feel Love. To live Love. To share Love.
WHAT I DO NEXT: I start. I write. I walk. I plan. I go. I do.
WHAT I DON’T ALWAYS DO: Stop and listen to Love first.
WHAT I WOULD LIKE TO DO INSTEAD: Learn to stop before, during and after whatever I am doing to listen to Love, lean into Love, be lead by Love.
HOW FEAR COMES IN: When I don’t stop, when I become compulsive in my actions and behavior, there comes a point where I lose sight of the initial impulse, which always comes from Love. When I start feeling this almost frantic feeling in my heart, then I know I’m off kilter. But if I ignore that and don’t stop, that’s when fear comes in. The compulsion comes from fear and it says: You can’t stop. You can’t stop. You can’t stop. If you stop, all the walls will come tumbling down.
WHAT LOVE IS ALWAYS SAYING: I’ve got this. You’re not the doer. I am. Lean in and let me lead the way.
WHAT FEELS COMPULSIVE: The fear of stopping. The fear of not finishing. The fear of having too much to do. The fear of silence. The fear of empty space. The drive to do do do walk walk walk do do do.
WHAT FEELS COMPELLING: The grace of co-creation. The beauty of the birds and flowers and trees and sky on my walks. Seeing what comes through, like write now, as I put my fingers on the keyboard and let Love write this blog or build that website or talk to that client.
WHY THIS MATTERS: A we have all become more and more compulsive, Love has become less and less compelling. The less we allow ourselves to be led by Love, the more we are driven by fear or the desire for distraction or our many addictions to substances of all kind (food, money, things, identities).
WHAT IS NOT WHOLE: Any time we are not fully letting ourselves be led by Love, we are compulsively trying to fill the hole that Love seems to have left behind. Not realizing that we are never not whole in Love, and all we have to do is stop, lean, listen, and love.
HOW I WILL PRACTICE WHOLENESS:
I will wake up and listen to Love.
I will listen and be led.
I will check in with Love instead of just doing.
I will let Love compel instead of fear tell me that I need to be compulsive in my doing.
I will learn to stop my compulsive doing more often, and instead listen to what Love is compelling me to do.
I will understand that each time I choose Love’s path, I am turning away from the lie that compulsive doing makes me whole.
I will be grateful for this practice of wholeness.
I will know that nothing can be less than whole and that these practices are simply about waking up and getting realigned.
I will stand in Love’s presence unafraid. Always.
I will know that we are all the loved of Love. No exceptions.
And I will trust that this heart-centered practice of wholeness is available to us all. No exceptions, and be grateful to able to learn it and share it.
In this way I will let Love love through me.
Today’s video looks at this from a different perspective — the perspective of our Mother Earth.